pulling out my camera

Whenever I'm having a hard time finding the joy in mothering my brood (and let's be honest, mothering the twins), I pull out my camera.

For some reason, viewing snapshots of my daily life makes me realize just how fortunate I am.

 I mean seriously!  Look. at. these. two.

Are they not the cutest things ever?!
Are cameras not the best piece of equipment a parent can own?!

CUTE is not a good enough word

Perhaps you expected a lot more twin cuteness on this blog.
Truthfully, I did too.

I simply have not had the energy or the time!
Yes, I suppose that is obvious, and if I were being realistic I might have realized this would be the case.  But you never know what something will be like until you've lived it.  And life with twins is something you can only imagine.  If you have children, you have a little bit of a better idea what two at a time is like.

Let me tell you...it's crazy.
And it's wonderful.
It's exhausting.
It's busy.
And it's so incredibly fun!
You have all of the adorable, precious, heart-swelling sweetness of one baby...times two!

Loretta and Graham at 6 weeks

But had you asked me what it was like any time in the first seven weeks, I would have only given you the exhausting and crazy answers.
I was only getting about 4 hours of interrupted sleep each night.  Mastering breastfeeding was a month long challenge. I cried every evening as I tried for 40  minutes to get my daughter to latch on.  When one of them would finally fall asleep, the other would awake. Or worse, one would wake and cry while I was already busy feeding the other. When they hit a growth spurt, or needed to increase my milk supply, at 2 and 4 weeks, I literally sat in my chair and nursed all day long.  I was always hungry.  I longed for a 30 minute steaming-hot shower.  I wrote mixed up notes to the kids' school teachers.  I word botched or spoke complete nonsense on a daily basis.

But gradually, life with twins got easier. And at seven weeks, I started finding the joy in raising them.

You know why I say seven weeks?  Because that is when they first smiled at me.
I was having a pretty rotten morning.  I was exhausted and wondering "why did I get twins? Why me?!?" I went outside (because that was one of the surest ways to stop their crying), sat on the bench, and placed Graham on my lap. He made eye contact with me and smiled! (Loretta had already smiled, but Grandma and Daddy got those ones). In an instant, all the sleepless nights, all the tears of frustration, all the floors we paced, all of it...was paid off by the sweetest, most fleeting smile.

And now that they are 12 weeks old, we have lots of daily doses of baby love.  They are smiling and coo-ing and wiggly and squirmy and basically the most squishable, lovable little beings out there.

Graham and Loretta - 3 months old

Our family is always saying "they're just SO cute!". But cute is not a good enough word.  Cute does not convey what happens when you hold your newborn baby.  It is not a strong enough word to explain how your heart swells to bursting, or how the rainiest day is suddenly sunshine, or how you relax and smile, or how the laughter bubbles up from deep within, or how you would give your very life for this tiny little being (or these two!).  So we all continue to say "they are just so CUTE!".
We love on them like crazy.  Although I'm not sure who's doing the loving and who is receiving!
These two babies (as were all my other babies) are the best cure for any frowns, because they are just so cute.

So if you are a soon-to-be mother, or another mother of a newborn (or are lucky like me and have multiples)...take heart.  The exhaustion, discomfort, and pain will all be worth it soon.  Life does get easier. You will be rewarded.  You will get to shower again some day.  You will eventually sleep (I'm still waiting for that one).

And if you try to explain your baby or mine, and can only come up with "they are soo cute!", it's okay.
I completely understand what you mean.

How we girls get-er-done

One morning, the girls and I spent some quality time together.

Cleaning their room.

We had way too many stuffed animals and dolls, and it was time to get rid of some.

I think we'll keep the one on the left!

No seriously...we had some great girl's time!

Because not a whole lot of cleaning was getting done.

And because for some reason my camera was on the bed beside me.

It started out well.  I nursed Loretta on the bed, and directed the girls to bring everything out of the closet and start making piles: donate, keep, and trash.

Loretta fell asleep, and since Graham was sleeping soundly already, I decided to hold her while she slept (who wants to clean, anyway? It's way more fun to hold sleeping babies).

photo credits to Aubrey

In hindsight, being in my robe probably hindered my productivity...but anyway, after seeing this picture on my camera, I noticed that there was really great lighting in their room. So we rolled with it.

Elaina makes a really great subject.

Actually, both girls are really photogenic.  And a whole lot of fun.

While Loretta slept, I snapped pictures. And we laughed at how Loretta bounced on my chest when I laughed.

It was a fun hour.

This was what the bedroom looked like when we left it that morning.

Yeah. We got a lot done!

Later that day (after I had finally gotten dressed) I went back in there alone and finished cleaning and organizing. 

I didn't mind. I prefer my photos and the fun we had to their help getting the room done.